Steve Conroy: Boyd, Miller and Whittaker v Hibs.

A dry, but cold, Sunday afternoon, in early February, on the once glorious Clydeside, was not the place for Steve Conroy and Chums to let those little things known as the Laws Of The Game get in the way of a Bankrupt saving league win for The Huns.

Kris Boyd told Hibs Merouane Zemmama to "shut it" after the Moroccan was left crumbled on the floor like an empty packet of Monster Munch after an elbow in the face from The Tarbolton Gerd Muller.

"It's a mans game" boasted Boydie and that he trotted out the excuse that he is "not that type of player" which is always used when an assault takes place.

Steve Conroy decided that this "obstruction" was worth a yellow card, meaning that Boydchenko will be available for the up-coming Glesga Derby, while hundreds of defence lawyers have been contacted by clients who are serving 2 to 3 years for lesser actions.

The BBC site describes the gemme changing award of the R*ngers penalty as "Miller went down under a challenge from Bamba", which flies in the face of their own camera evidence, which shows Miller going down before Bamba was near him.

The afternoon started with Steven Whitafucker scoring a goal then leaving the field of play to high five with some monkies that were out on day release under supervised attendance orders.

Conroy took pity and never booked the player for this as he was doing his bit for the community. Whitafucker was booked later in the game.

Just another day in the world of down right cheating or incompetence.  

Unrating The Gemme: The Wind Beneath My Wings Edition.

Tale Of The Tape

ABERDEEN (4-4-2) Langfield; Foster, Diamond, Mulgrew, Paterson (y); Paton (Ifil 90), Kerr, McDonald, Aluko (Fyvie 70); Big Cunty Baws, Mackie(y)

Subs not used: Nelson, Young, Duff, Grassi, Marshall



CELTIC (4-4-2) Tubby; The Cad, Clubfoot, Myth (yy), Barrowfield; Aiden (y), Captain Broonie, Landry (Davie 64), Kris; Keano (Fannyras 73), MAF (Rasputin 64)

Subs not used: Cool Hand Luka, Wilo, The Weasel, ZZ



Stats Entertainment



Possession 44% to 56% away win

On Target 6 to 15 away win

Off Target 2 to 3 away win

Corners 4 to 6 away win

Fouls 13 to 14 away.



I'm beginning to doubt the validity of these stats. Ashley Cole has come up wie mair believable excuses than these. It looks like we were once again unlucky. Those who watched it will disagree.



Match Rating: -5



Any gemme that is described as a great advert for the Scottish gemme, which involves us, is code for a great gemme fir everywan not oaf a Celtic mind to laugh at the feeble excuse of a performance fae us.



It was like holding doon the spacebar while looking at a map oan Google earth. Something quite queasy and sick aboot it.



Those Who Stare At Goats.



Ian Brines turned in a performance that got me thinking that he isn't biased and isn't worth thinking up ways to torture his wife, weans and pets but he is jist an incompetent buffoon wie all the tact and blinkered intelligence of a Gorilla on heat.



He was terrible again and his assistants take oan what is and what is not offside was obliviously influenced by the Book According To John Gilmour.



It Can't Be Paranoia highlights one of his many cracking decisions here.


Brines also failed to follow the letter of the law by not booking Big Cunty Baws after he left the park to celebrate his equaliser something that Celtic players, Rasputin and Fannyras, have been booked for recently.
Big Cunty Baws also removed his jersey. I'm sure there is a paragraph in the rules aboot that as well.



There is also the incident when Big Cunty Baws booted the ba' away in the last minute, which Brines who had booked the Glasgow Born Irishman fir the same offence decided to ignore.



Thir also seems to be an opinion of those who take drugs that We Used To Be Famous FC should have goat a penalty when Tubby and Big Cunty Baws collided in the box. Brines goat that wan right.



But...this man should really be getting his pea fae his whistle shoved right up his Erchie by Hugh Dallas.



Sleeping Wie The Enemy



Deserved mair than what they goat. Play fir set plays close enough to yer goal and allow Mulgrew to Hail Mary into the box. In Darren Mackie they have a player who is like a blind ferret chasing the scent of a dead budgie. He shouldnae annoy but has a tendency to knock over yer guid china.



The rest are made from the fabric of sweat and effort but are not guid enough to wear outside yer work.



Another team who some how found The Performance Of Thir Season against us. Then stumble into an embarrassing defeat.Heh.


The Bhoys A Bit Special.



Tubby at a high 8. Kept us in the gemme, didnae deserve to be oan the losing side and, I will regret saying this, maybe should start commanding his 6 yard box a bit mair at set plays. Yes, come fir every single ba'.



Tadger Of The Match.



Edson Barrowfield. In a season littered wie bombscare performances I feel his tops the lot. Well, Loovens and Big Micks first 20 mins in Vienna takes some topping but oor Edson decided to try and better it.



Worryingly I have been informed that he is prone to this type of gemme and wan such howler in a match fir Munich lead to him finding his way tae the East End in the first place.



At least we never hud the spectre of Danny Fox laughing at us fae MOTD this week.



The Others



The Cad: -5



Like those British Skiers that finished 55th and 74th in the cross country, it don't impress me much.



Clubfoot: -4



Phone Max Clifford. He seems decent at making money out oaf a bad situation. Don't strip oaf fir the NOTW though.



Myth: -5



Maybe you should contact Piers Morgan and ask him to do a searching interview it may provide some much needed public sympathy.



Aiden: 4



A booking, a goal and a right guid moan.



Captain Broonie: 3



Hope springs eternal at the fountain of youth. Think you have missed that boat.



Landry: 2



I'm sure the IPhone has an APP to re-find yer form.



Davie: 2



Unfortunately yer guilty by association.



Kamara: 3



Seemed slightly off colour like an ill fitting condom oan a eunuch.



Keano: 3



I think this chapter oaf yer career my be titled: 'Arry's Revenge'.



Fannyras: -2



Like Lady Ga Ga's cock yer jist something that shouldnae really be discussed.



Rasputin: 1



As useful as a tatchell satchel. Has a purpose but someday's it's jist useless.



The Manager: 0



The fact that thir is not a trace oaf a game plan fir the defence means that the clamour fir you to be belle of the dole is reaching fire up the BBQ level.



Yer looking increasingly like yer suffering fae Susan Boyle In An Airport Syndrome. I think thir is a place in Switzerland that could cure that.

It's A Sad Day When Mark McGhee Seems A Guid Option

"Don't Fancy Yours Much" 

You know that yer mind is playing tricks oan you when you start thinking that "So You Think You Can Dance" is great Saturday night entertainment and that Primark do a great range of cardigans that you could wear to yer work.

You scrape the bottom oaf the barrel though when you start thinking that thir might be something aboot Mark McGhee.

The most hated man in Scottish Fitba' has played a blinder in the last few weeks. After nicking a draw to the Mighty Kirkcaldy Rovers he used the tool of the written press to huv a go at the Famous In The 80's FC support accusing them of being over critical of his players.

The Famous In The 80's FC support took exception at this and are guaranteed to support such luminaries as Darren Mackie and the eye make up wearing cross dressing emo looking 16 year old Fraser Fyvie, wie such gusto that even if the support found thir wife being part of a prawn sandwich between, Zander Diamond and Charlie Mulgrew they wid forgive them and say: "Go on!"

McGhee has used this to develop a siege mentality in his group of averagely endowed players by asking them to prove that they are guid enough to play fir the once famous club.

He then added to that mentality by his throw away comment regarding the Inactive Scottish Cup. He knew that the press wid react in outrage at the very inkling that The Once Famous Club wid lay doon to those pesky kids fae the East and the Red Tops wrote his team-talk.

Mind gemmes of the highest order. It's an art oor manager disnny do.

I'm sitting here typing this wondering how Mark McGhee wid have reacted to the injustices we have faced this season.

I'm sitting thinking he is a manager going places and oors is like a one-legged duck going round in circles.

Despite awe this, The Once Famous Club never goat what they deserved.

They deserved to win. GIRUY! Yease didnae!

At 4-2 down wie 20 minutes to go they should have been mourning the loss of 3 points like a farmer mourning the passing of his prize Ewe. But..this Celtic team don't get what they deserve nevermind get whit they dinny deserve.

For us being in that situation means that it's two points lost to the most Burberry clad casual observer to us others that look at the whole 9 yards it's actually a point gained.

Oor lame duck manager said it wis inexplicable that we threw the gemme away. Those of us that pay attention say it was predictable as 15 points pished up against a wall fae winning positions this season is a testament to soaking trainers.

How did it come to this? Well..everybody in? And we will begin.

The Myth wandered in from playing Mario Kart in the treatment room wie Frodo to partner Clubfoot in the heart of a defence so weak that Donald Findlay widnae take oan it's case.

The bench again screamed that by some shot we have the best collection of players in the land, defence apart who are not the best set of defenders in the bottom half of the SPL, and that the question of why we are failing so badly now needs to be answered and acted upon by someone qualified.

The only reason we goat a point was due to Tubby in the goal. Weeks oaf inactivity seemed to have sharpened his Garfield Shaped Cat Instincts and in a second half, when the term hanging oan was a fair description oaf the fare, he produced a number of saves reminiscent of that goalie we had in 2006.

He also goat a hand to a penalty. Ok, he never saved it but it wis better than diving the wrong way. Top man!

The Cad has developed a style of a rabbit oan a B road being faced doon wie a Essex Tractor. His stock is diminishing quicker than my lucky underpant drawer.

In the middle fir diddle Clubfoot won the award oaf being oor best defender oan the day but that's no compliment when him and his partner in crime, The Myth, didnae win a heider awe day and they visibly wilted everytime any sort of loutish lob entered thir air space.

The Myth, jist returning fae injury played like a rickets ridden Victorian chimney sweep and his sending oaf wis the highlight oaf his day.

Edson Barrowfield has caught the curse oaf the left back. Had a massive, ahem, hand in 3 Sheepie scores and the moment he auditioned fir the La Lakers wis the gemme changing moment. Lee Naylor and Anton Rogan looked oan suitable impressed.

It wis a mixed day fir the widemen. Aiden was like a toddler running around oan Aberdeen beach dribbling around badly assembled sandcastles and his goal when he collected a short corner, enticed the defender wie his alluring smell of Musk Fir Men then dinked it by him and rocketed his first shot oan target in weeks past Lounging Langfield wis wan fir his scrapbook.

The following in Pharaoh, Kris Kamara hud goat the Hoops oaf to a perfect start after he slid hame fie a tight angle striking northwards. He faded, seemed bemused by the fact that he wis playing oan a beach.

Captain Broon and Landry were striped fir duty problem wis that no-one knows quite what that duty wis. Being courageous and competitive surely wir oan the list but uncreative and careless whir late editions tae it fae the opposing.

Captain Broon deserving a nod and a wink fir his feed the bear type stride in the lead up to oor second goal. Though, if he needs to see how to keep the ba', Davie came oan and wie 3 completed passes and more than doubled oor middle midfield men's completion rate fir the day. 

He also hit a Korean rocket that Lounging Langfield palmed away before continuing his knuckle shuffle while thinking aboot his performance.

The Unholy Trinty Of Failed EPL strikers scored. I would expect them to score maist weeks as if truth be told then are better than what they will face week in and week oot. It's jist unfortunate that they huv been bad in a previous life and thir strikes willnae save thir souls that oor back 4 serve up to the Devil on a weekly basis.

The Solider Of Fortune had a difficult afternoon. His goal wis a thing of beauty. A driving run fae Captain Caveman and a teasing pass, so teasing that it was akin to feeding a pony through a horsebag, fae Keano served him up wie an easy rap a tap tap at the back post.  

His other work failed to pass trading standards regulations.

The  Mis-Sitter Messiah kept his non-strike rate doon tae two shots that hit the goalie and he lended a shovel to another two of the holes we dug in the once famous clubs goals against column. He scored after The Cad rather uncivilised horsed a ball to the back post allowing Robbie to out jump a defender at the back post to send a loopy Lou into the net.

He will have better days and the hook he received jist afterwards fir Fannyras wisnny a reflection oan his contribution but because Fannyras could defend set plays better than a midget.

Yes, you did read that right. Fannyras brought oan due to his defensive abilities. Rasputin was brought oan, I think, to waste time.

We are a team that looks like Bette Midler. From a distance we look a sure bet up close we are fuckin' butt ugly and it's like watching Beaches oan repeat.

The chances to make this a race not a canter are running oot. The odds that Project ToMo will end up buried in a rubbish tip wie Johnnie 5 and Metal Mikey are getting shorter by the day.

Where do we go from here? No where near Mark McGhee I hope and it's safer at the moment to go doon the pub than think aboot it. The fat lady is not singing but that burd fae the Sally Army has goat her trumpet oot and is striking up a tune.

Paaaaarrrrrrrppppppp!

YIC.                                     

Video Lowlights: Aberdeen Horror Show.

The morning after the night before. These pictures still make grim viewing. But....we need to understand and we need to learn fae the mistakes. Just, that, we never do. Done up like kippers on and off the park.

Another day, another week hoping that this is the bottom. This is as bad as it gets. Really, can it get any worse? People speak in hushed tones, that are getting louder, that he has to go.

Is it really that catastrophic? Has it come to this?

I'm oan the fence and it's chaffing uncomfortable.

YIC 

Those Who Stare At Goats Season Review So Far...Food For The Paranoia

Taken from the Real Radio Phone site but I'm sure it was doing the rounds on Celtic Cybertimdom over the last couple of days.

For the propose of reference only I have decided to post it.

After last night’s controversial decision to rule out a perfectly good Motherwell goal for offside, Real Football Phone-In listener Keith sent us an email pointing out that this isn’t the first time that Rangers have benefited from an official’s decision this season.

What do you think? Get in touch below.

Message from Keith

Decisions that have went against Celtic have cost Celtic 9 points this season. Rangers have gained 6 points from dodgy decisions and have stayed in the Scottish Cup due to a dodgy decision. A potential 15 point swing based on poor refereeing decisions.

3 opposing SPL managers make admission to the poor decisions against Celtic and a ref admits to error.

8 stonewall penalties denied for Celtic and 4 valid goals chopped off.

Here are just some examples and quotes from media.

10 February 2010 - Motherwell 1 Rangers 1

Motherwell denied a goal which was 2 yards onside that would have put them 2-0 up. Linesman flagged incorrectly for offside.

Craig Brown was livid after seeing TV evidence showing goal was well onside, TV pundits Hendry and Butcher both agree goal should have stood. Ray Stubbs on ESPN said that point could make all the difference at end of season.

ONE point gained for Rangers

16 January 2010 - Celtic v Falkirk 3 major decisions go against Celtic

    
1. Hand ball by Falkirk defender - no penalty
    
2. Fortune pulled down in box - no penalty
    
3. Arthur handles ball 17 yards from goal 1 yard inside his box and a free kick is given to Falkirk 20 yards from goal. This could have given Falkirk the winning goal

Referee - Alan Muir

Mail on Sunday - 'Falkirk manager Eddie May said: "Overall, I thought it was a fair result. But I think they should have had a penalty."

Daily Mail - 'Alan Muir denied the Parkhead club a late penalty claim - when Brian McLean tangled with Fortune - in the 1-1 draw with Falkirk on Saturday. Hinkel was also unhappy about Celtic keeper Artur Boruc being penalised for apparently stepping out of his area late on. "It's not really my thing to say something about referees but, once again, we had some very strange decisions," said Hinkel. Not even just the penalty - look at the situation when Artur had a free-kick given against him.

TWO points dropped. Opposing manager admits Celtic should have had penalty.

10 January 2010 - Hamilton v Rangers

3-2 down and a very very doubtful penalty given to Rangers, Hamilton player lying on ground while trying to move his hand away hand ball penalty given.

Referee – Charlie Richmond

Scotsman - "They needed a touch of good fortune to equalise when referee Charlie Richmond rather harshly penalised Hamilton debutant Stuart Elliott for handball, awarding the spot-kick from which Kenny Miller converted."

A gift given to Rangers by ref to keep them in the Cup. It’s okay saying Richmond denied Miller a penalty in the replay but if it was not for the ludicrous decision in first game there would have been no replay.

3 January 2010 - Celtic v Rangers

2 shocking decisions cost Celtic the 3 points (regardless of the poor finishing) Fortune scores a goal - chopped off incorrectly.

Lafferty assaults Hinkel - a red card offence but only yellow given.

Referee - Steve Conroy

Scotsman - "Following the controversial decision by Conroy to disallow what looked like a perfectly good Fortune goal after 19 minutes. Moments later, Rangers striker Kyle Lafferty was perhaps fortunate only to be booked for a late challenge on Celtic right-back Andreas Hinkel."

TWO points dropped. ONE point gained for Rangers. 2 derbies in a row that multiple decisions go against Celtic.

12 December 2009 - Motherwell v Celtic

Celtic denied TWO stonewall penalties.

Samaras chopped in box in 1st half - No penalty.

Hand ball by Motherwell defender - No penalty.

Referee - Charlie Richmond

Celtic do get penalty but only after having 3 claims for a penalty, two of which were stonewallers.

Guardian - "Even if Celtic did have a legitimate claim for a penalty when Samaras was tripped by Reynolds. Another two poor decisions from referee Charlie Richmond denied them penalties after McGeady had equalised. When Celtic were finally awarded a penalty for Saunders's foul on Samaras, Robson gave the goalkeeper an easy save with a weak shot close to his left side."

8 November 2009 - Falkirk v Celtic

At 3-3 in last minute Celtic had a goal disallowed when TV showed it was ONSIDE.

Flag goes up for offside when Samaras clearly onside right through on goal.

Referee - Brian Winter

Daily Record - "Celtic fans yelped in frustration - and their mood would not have improved when television replays showed assistant Lawrence Kerrigan was wrong to flag for offside when Samaras was played in behind the Bairns defence in injury time."

His shot may have been blocked by Olejnik but it dropped to McDonald who poked the ball into the net only to see the flag fluttering along his line of vision. To be fair, Celtic players kept their protests to a minimum.

TWO points dropped

4 October 2009 - Rangers v Celtic

Celtic denied TWO stonewall penalties. Maloney booked for diving. Referee later apologises for getting one penalty decision rong.

Lafferty assaults Zhing Zhi and Weir recklessly follows through on McDonald. Neither booked.

Referee - Craig Thomson

STV website and various media - "Old Firm referee Craig Thomson has admitted he’s 'disappointed' at getting his decision wrong when he decided not to award Celtic a penalty in the 12th minute. Hugh Dallas said: 'Craig and I have had our post match de-brief. Whilst I would compliment Craig for his overall handling of yesterday's encounter, he is disappointed at his error of judgement when he decided against awarding a penalty to the visiting team in the 12th minute.'"

Motherwell manager Jim Gannon later said: "Right now there is a question mark over the standard of our refereeing, and it affects the SPL table. After the last Old Firm game Hugh Dallas had to defend the referee [Craig Thomson]. But the result of that match might have been different had the ref got the big decisions correct.

“At the end of the season Celtic could look back and say, ‘That result cost us the title.’ The fact is, if no one speaks up, then nothing will change.”

Assuming the worst Celtic would have gained a draw with 2 or 3 penalties being awarded.

ONE point dropped. TWO gained by Rangers.

26 September 2009 - Rangers v Aberdeen

McCulloch elbows Aberdeen player deliberately. No card and No TV evidence case by SPL.

Referee - Iain Brines

Daily Record - "Rangers midfielder Lee McCulloch, however, was fortunate not to pick up a red card from Brines for an elbow on McGuire."

Rangers would have been playing 45 mins with 10 men if Brines had done his job. Next match for Rangers was Old Firm game. McCulloch escapes ban which could have been a 3 match ban for violent conduct.

21 September 2009 - Celtic v Hearts

McGinn chopped in box. Stonewall penalty denied with 5 mins to go.

Referee - Dougie McDonald

Daily Record - "The Northern Irish international was brought down inside the box by Lee Wallace with five minutes to go of Sunday's SPL clash at Parkhead, only for referee Dougie McDonald to award a corner to the bemusement of everyone inside the stadium."

Belfast Telegraph - "Five minutes from the end of normal time, the Irishman was denied what looked a clear-cut penalty by referee Dougie McDonald when he appeared to be chopped down by Jambos' left-back Lee Wallace as he burst into the Hearts penalty area. "

Celtic scored in 93rd minute and got the 3 points.

13 September - 2009 - Celtic v Dundee Utd

Celtic had a Samaras goal incorrectly chopped off for offside. Also denied stonewall penalty when Dodds handled ball in last minute. Dodds admitted to hand ball. Levein said he was surprised he never caught it.

Referee - Steve Conroy.

Scotland on Sunday - "Levein left the field quietly at the end and there was probably a reason for that. His side appeared to come out the right side of two highly contentious calls in the second half; a Georgios Samaras "goal" chalked off and a Celtic penalty claim waved away by referee Steve Conroy. The "goal" was put away by Samaras just before the hour mark and only a couple of minutes after he came on for Landry N'Guemo."

Tony Mowbray, in his understated way, challenged us to look at the incident on video, the comment of a man who is convinced that Samaras' effort should have stood. Much later, a couple of minutes into injury time in fact, an Andreas Hinkel cross hit Darren Dodds on the arm and many a spot-kick has been given in such circumstances. Asked about it later, Levein offered a cheeky response: "I've spoken to Darren about it and he said he was really disappointed he never held it. Dodds said: "The ball hit my head and then hit my thumb." That's that, then. It should have been a penalty."

TWO points dropped.

30 August 2009 - Hibs v Celtic

McGeady sent off for diving 45 yards from goal after riding a few tackles after going on a run.

Referee - Dougie McDonald

24 August 2009 - Hearts v Rangers

Rangers heading for a draw, awarded penalty in last minute for tackle which looked soft and looked outside box.

Referee - Craig Thomson

Daily Mail - "The Tynecastle side thought the penalty was harsh, arguing that the foul by Ismael Bouzid on Steven Naismith was committed outside the penalty box, while Rangers considered Thomson unlucky to be red-carded."

TWO points gained for Rangers.

**Thank you to "Keith" who sent this e-mail**

Dougal Balls

Despite new evidence showin' that Linesman John Gilmour was correct to chop aff Motherwells, Ross Forbes, goal the other night against The Forces Of Evil (see above) former "top whistler" Stuart Dougal, as expected, has come out wie a spirited defence of the under fire lino.



The full laughable defence is below

John Gilmour was once left with badly bruised ribs after a run-in with Rangers and this time he will be nursing a thumping headache of regret.

If anyone has cause to feel ill will against Walter Smith's side it's Gilmour, as honest as they come and one of the best assistants in our game, but revenge has never been part of the vocabulary of our officials.

Kris Boyd cemented him in the Scottish Cup Final of 2008 as the striker raced for a ball on the touchline against Queen of the South and it took the official a fortnight to recover from being barged so heavily with 13 stones of solid muscle it left him doubled up in agony.

It was an accident, of course, as Boyd made a fair decision to go for the ball, only to end up causing a lot of pain.

In fact, that incident was much like the flag Gilmour hoisted in the air at Fir Park on Wednesday night that prevented Motherwell taking a 2-0 lead against the SPL leaders.

Let me cut to the chase. Gilmour got the decision wrong - you know it and I know it but he doesn't need anyone to tell him that, although there would've been no shortage of fans ready to do so yesterday.

But spare me the outcries, the conspiracy theories and the insidious nudge-nudge, wink-wink punditry that points the finger solely at the assistant for the gap at the top of the SPL not being seven points today.

Here's what I reckon happened early in the second half, with Motherwell a goal in front and their players already wheeling away to celebrate a second goal before Gilmour raised his flag.

In all likelihood Gilmour lost concentration at the vital moment as he saw the ball heading for the corner of the net off the shin of Stephen Craigan and considered his job done.

Suddenly, Ross Forbes appeared on the scene to bundle the ball over the line. The linesman didn't see him arrive - even the ESPN commentators claimed he came from nowhere - and the official suddenly had a decision to make.

To put it bluntly, Gilmour gambled that Forbes had come from an offside position - and he got it wrong. Take note all those who say I never admit to mistakes from officials.

As always, the assistant became the fall guy for Motherwell's failure to win but the Fir Park faithful - and other fans as well - should look closer to home for the culprits.

Firstly, Forbes showed stupidity and selfishness to knock the ball over the line when it was already on its way into the net.

Critics will fire back that's what good strikers do but the very best strikers are aware of everything going on around them and Forbes needlessly attempted to pick the pocket of his skipper by taking his goal.

It was a senseless thing to do because it immediately asked a question of an assistant that didn't need to be asked. Trust me on this, the assistant will be hurting about that decision for some time to come.

The critics have been out in force, alleging that decision cost Well three points, but that unwanted title must go to Mark Reynolds as it was his poor defending that allowed Boyd in near the end to snatch an equaliser.

If Gilmour cost Motherwell a 2-0 lead, defender Reynolds cost his side all three points by his failure to close down Boyd.

Now, I'm a fan of Craig Brown and his comments afterwards were measured and diplomatic as he voiced support of officials and conceded his players played a part in their own failure to win the game.

But I'm also a firm believer that actions speak louder than words and this was not the message Craig was giving out just 10 minutes earlier as he vented his spleen against the officials as they tried to get off the pitch.

Why wasn't Craig as vociferous in his public condemnation of Reynolds?

I have immense respect for Craig but if he really wants to point the finger he should have done it at individuals within his defence. Let's face it, if they had done their jobs they would have won 1-0. Instead, the only rebukes we have been reading about and hearing are against an official.

I know Hotline callers will only say it's Dougal trying to defend refs again but there needs to be a balance to the fierce criticism that seems to envelope our men in black, especially as the title heads towards another exciting climax.

I don't want to have a go at anyone for the sake of it but as an ex-official I get fed up with good, decent, former colleagues copping all the flak when some of the biggest mistakes in the game are made by players who don't receive half the public condemnation doled out to referees and assistants.

By the way, don't think my anger has anything to do with the fact I fancied a fixed odds double - Rangers and Motherwell to draw, along with Manchester United at Villa.

It duly came up but yours truly didn't have time to get to the bookies and stake his 10 bob. You could say Gilmour wasn't the only official left cursing a gambling decision this week.

 Unbelievable? Naw, expected.
**thank you to John H on KDS for the photoshop.**

Unrating The Gemme: What's In Yer Sausage Roll Edition?

Some Pastrie and Some Sausage Meat. Better Than Greggs. Like.

Tale Of The Tape

CELTIC…2



(Hair 49, MAF 50)


Jam Farts…0



CELTIC (4-4-2) Tubby; The Cad, Clubfoot, Hair (Rogne 62), Barrowfield (Davie 77); Aiden (Y), Captain Broon, Landry, Kris; Keano, MAFSubs not used: Cool Hand Luka, ZZ, Rasputin, The Unloved Catalan



HEARTS (4-5-1) Kello; Jonsson (Y), Kucharski, Zaliukas (Y), Wallace; Stevenson, Cunt MKI, Cunt MKII (Y); Mulrooney (Y) (Santana 73), Obua, Nade (Glen 73)Subs not used: Balogh, Witteveen, R Wallace, Balatoni, Smith

Stats Entertainment

Possession: 69% to 31% home win
On Target: 6 to 0 home win
Off Target: 6 to 0 home win
Corners: 5 to 5 draw
Fouls: 8 to 7 home win (gulp!)

So, we commit 8 fouls and only get one player booked (for kicking the ball away) and they get 4 players booked for 7 fouls. Shows commitment to ensuring the fouls wir decent while oors wir petty.

No shots oan goal, no shots off goal and little possession shows the height of the Jam Farts ambition.

Match Rating: 5

Like eating a home made sausage roll you know that it's grease and fat content will kill you but you continue anyway and end up enjoying it and eating three or four.

Sleeping Wie The Enemy

No chance oaf you going in fir a hair oaf the moose wie these ugly bunch oaf munters. A weekend being bummed by a bunch of Young Conservatives after you are drugged and force feed poppers sounds mair appealing than going to Gorgie week in week out.

Bottom six is aboot right.

Them Who Stare At Goats

Bernie Winters 3

Booked Aiden jist before HT. It was petulant. I'll let you make up yer ain mind who I am thinking oaf wie that statement.

No chance to influence the gemme and seemed to deal wie the Thugs In Maroon pretty well. Apart fae......see Tadger

The Bhoys A Bit Special

Aiden and The Solider Of Fortune share this at a season high of 7. Both saw the bar being raised and drunk it dry.

Tadger Of The Match

Easy. Ian Black is easily the most hideous man in the SPL behind Lee Elbows McCooluck. Dirty wee fucker who wis born to play fir the wee huns as he is not quite scummy enough to earn his stripes to earn a livin' in Govan.

He should have walked fir a petulant kick on Clubfoot towards the end oaf the gemme. Clubfoot should have stamped him intae next week.

Debutant Bhoy

Thomas Rogne: 3

He came he saw and wondered what the fuss was aboot. Harder tests to come.

The Others

Tubby: 3

It must have been as boring as that Everybody Hurts Haiti appeal song.

The Cad: 4

Hey, I've goat some new shoes oan and everything is coming oot fine.

Clubfoot: 5

You won't face a sedated rhino every week.

Hair: 5

You have learned to exit proceedings before yer standards slip.

Barrowfield: 5

Not bad fir a Tinchy Stryder look-a-like. Gangsta.

Captain Broon: 5

Snarl, boot, snarl, boot......repeat to fade.

Landry: 5

Fuck sake Broonie whir you goin'.....

Davie: 3

Got the Unloved Catalan's appearance bonus.

Keano: 6

Like an Leprechaun on a gram oaf Columbia's finest but finishing fae like Heather Mills on Ice Stakes.

The Manager: 5

Your threat that we may get better sounded like a forlorn hope rather than a confident boast.

It's Not Only Pastries That Are Bad For Hearts

They awe want a piece of the Keano Pie. The biggest thing to hit Fitba' Ecosse since BFDJ fell doon the Radio Snide stairs has been getting mair inches than yer average Page 3 burd in China Whites.

First up wis everyone favourite Irish Italian George Trap O'Toni mumbling and pointing that Keano won't win us the league own is oan and Kenny Misser stuck his neb in gushing like a love sick 14 year old dreaming over Carol Vorderman fiddling wie his conundrum over the merits of Boydchenko.

He wid be better discussing the merits oaf officials in tones that drip oaf admiration at thir open and blatant commitment to "The Cause."

Over at The Midden, the staring contest that was doubling as a gemme oaf fitba', linesman John Gilmour decided to rip up the rule book and start again when he adjudge the onside, by 3 yards. Ross Forbes to be offside.

At that point MIB Callum Murray contacted Brian (from now oan we will call him Bernie) Winters to say that the dark arts pass had been used and to abort any plans to use it. Not that Bernie wid have much chance to use it. He should huv sent oaf Ian Black fir a kick oan Clubfoot though.

So what wis the view fae the hill? The Dr Feelgood factor expected to fill the vast swathes of green plastic didnae amount tae a wimper wie around only 7,000 mair bothering to turn up to see the hame debut of the Mis-Sitter Messiah.

Rumours that this news caused a missed 5 ft putt fir par in the Sandy Beach resort are unconfirmed.

ToMo rumbled around in his bag oaf tricks and pulled oot starting berths fir Keano, McGeady and MAF wie Rasputin, Crosas and Fannyras wondering whit they did wrong.

They filled the seats oan the bench alongside ZZ, Ronge and Davie. The bench screams options, options, options.

The changes maybe lent tae a poor first half performance in which the midfield could have done wie a bit of finesse and mess fight but a sizzling second period saw us win comfortably and get what we huv been due against The Jam Farts anytime we have matched up wie them.

The Jam Farts whir the right side oaf terrible baith oan and oaf the park. I love seeing Auld Mutton chomps switching fae damage limitation tae total damage limitation wit maist oaf the second period to play. Thir fans sounded like a bunch oaf Gary Tank Commanders except less funny and intelligent.

Oaf course none oaf them could make a hame made sausage roll between them.

Talking oaf Sausage Rolls, Tubby in the goal had time to finish the Daily Star sports crossword as The Jam Farts never registered a shot in anger much like the Swiss.

Over on the right, The Cad continued to keep Handy Andy's slippers warm with a display that ticked the box competent as it improved in the second period but he didnae match the gallus showman ship oan the left.

Edson Barrowfield is the first ever Glasgow Celtic left back that I have seen attempt keepie uppies while trying to clear his lines. Ok, he lost the ba' but what made it even mair impressive is that he won the ba' back!

Smart tattoos, a gallus attitude and the bottle to take a thug like challenges like a maaaaan before hobbling oaf and dashing fir an ice pack as his ankle swelt to the size of a volleyball.

In saying that The Cad gave us The Comedy Moment Of The Night Award. As Barrowfield was limping oaf and Davie was coming oan, Davie told Landry that another spell as right back wis beckoning.

The sight oaf The Cad wandering to left back then changing his mind as he sprinted back to right back shouting at Landry he could play oan the left instead reminded me of Shaggy fae Scooby Doo not wanting to go into the graveyard to hunt fir ghosts and he sends delectable Daphine instead.

In the middle, Hair again confirmed his crash test dummy credentials. His goal contained a pirouette, a bit of skill and poor defending but, again, he limped oaf holding his hammie.

Has Frodo sneezed oan him or something? Like a car of a certain vintage he is now falling apart anytime he takes to the road. A trade in for a younger model maybe needed but he may not qualify fir the government scrap page scheme due to a faulty MOT certificate.

Is that younger model Clubfoot? Young Josh has sent some into raptures wie his performances but what's to impress when fir so long we huv been starved oaf a centre back that doesn't make glaring errors and not being spectacular is deemed as a Great White Hope?

The hungry will eat a Kraft Cheese slice on a mouldy loaf if that's awe that is oan offer.

Last night he wis faced wie Christen Nade who is a pitbull that keeps oan running into the patio doors until it's owner comes home and pits it oot it's misery by opening them. Not the maist intelligent test Clubfoot will have but he handled it in a sort oaf non-plussed way.

The other runner and rider is young Thomas Ronge. He wandered into the fray looking like Norwegian Royalty judging a gymkhana. His stride was as measured and choreographed as one of those horse he wis judging.

Oor defence on Saturday could contain a CB that runs like a show horse and another that runs like a carthorse.

The midfield engine contained two on heat Jack Russells who were determined to catch thir ain tale. Broonie and Landry struggled in the first period. Sometimes we will need to sacrifice a wide virgin like those pagans on religious Scottish Islands to add a bit of fitba' to the fuzzy energy that those two possess.

They won't pick the lock of a well guarded door they will brick the windaes and get them oot in the garden fir a square go. That 'quality' is needed at times but other times you need a bit mair savvy.

Davie fae the East End came oan and threw his Merton Parka oan the peg fir that role.

When the gemme upped pace in the second period it suited thir style. The Rhodders on Saturday will suit thir style.

Aiden oor Aiden. Booked aftir he stumbled fae Lee Wallace's pocket at half time but in the second period he resembled Indiana Jones ducking, weaving, dodging and jumping central American Indian spears as he set up The Soldier Of Fortune for a classily, cool and calculated finish.

He looked like he enjoyed himself in the 2nd period as took part in the mini gemme called: Set Up Robbie.

Another wan that wis taking part in that mini gemme wis Kris Kamara. As he broke up the field oan a lightening quick break he choose the correct pass to slip in Keano. That's right. Wan of oor forward thinking players played the correct pass.

Call the cops and Fannyras call a taxi. Whisper this. This freaky Mummy looking baldy could be the real deal. Mmmmm.

We huv and unholy trinity oaf front players that could hold thir water wieoot the aid oaf Pampers in the EPL. Creating chances wie those bodies is a given. It's the missing oaf the chances that's the worry.

The Mis-Sitter Messiah has spent the last few lonely evenings in his hole room reading the Harald Brattbakk Book Of Finishing and it's the new edition where Scott McDonald hus written the forward oan how to beat the offside trap.

He hit the side netting, hit the goalie, flicked by the post, hit the goalie (again), spun and hit the defender then spun and fired wan across the bar from 12 yards.

He then suffered the ultimate embarrassment that aftir the last miss Fannyras wandered over picked him up and telt him to keep his chinny chin chin up.

The cheek oaf the greek.

The Solider Of Fortune looks wie every passing week like oor main striker. Power, presence, panache and poolka that you get fir nearly 4 million bucks.

Sure, thir will be some gemmes that he will drift but coupled wie Keane this could be a partner ship that communicates on levels oaf ESP last thought oaf when Speilburg wis writing Close Encounters Of The Third Kind meaning that his quiet days could be profitable.

The gemme meandered to a close as the fans drifted and dreamed oaf Motherwell not blinking but they did. Wance we look like we will play every gemme like the 2nd half oaf this wan then we can hope and wonder what is happening elsewhere.

This 3 points will mean nuthin' if we drop points at The Rhodders oan Saturday. Tonight, was a jist maybe the start oaf the fightback oor a light at the end oaf the tunnel when we start chipping away at an embarrassing deficit.

More likely it's jist the 5.15 fae Carluke that hus been delayed due to points failure.

YIC.

Really Kirrard?

South Korean starlet Ki Sung Yong will jet into No Mean City on Saturday to seal his deal or as the more cynical of us think to add a few thousand onto the gate in the hope he comes out at half time for a wee wave and hello.

His exclusive interview is one of those interviews that either makes you want to laugh, cry, cry expletives in bemusement or rush out and buy a South Korean top and feel the warm glow that you have someone to support at next years World Cup.

The Young Asian Player Of The Year waxed lyrical about A lot of foreigners say that they grew up watching Celtic - but I genuinely did, he says I loved Henrik Larsson, he was a brilliant player for Celtic.

The youngster, whose idol is Steven Gerrard and the on the ball Korean press prove they have a sense of humour by calling him Kirrard, also gushes They also have an incredible history and almost everyone knows who they are and that To come to a club like Celtic is just a dream come true because they are HUGE in Asia.

While must youngsters dreamed of being on Pop Idol or something our Sung Yung says When the games are on TV and you're watching them as a kid, you never think that one day you'll end up playing for them.

You would have almost have thought that a South Korean Celtic fan that went to John Paul College was creation of the under pressure PLC.

Update: According to site lurker Pujol Ki Sung Yung is Korean for Our Day Will Come. I'm off to Sports Soccer...

The Begining.....We Have Moved.

After a few hairy moments we have finally moved to OleOle. Here's The Blog it's bigger, better faster and stronger. Same old shite getting written but what do you want for free.? Blood? Sweat? Tears? A limb?

The reasons for moving are explained here. The Lord Of The Wing homepage is here. The Celtic homepage (which you can update and manage) is here: Celtic Homepage

Let the revolution begin.





Forza

The End......

"The Lord Of The Wing" (LOTW) started three seasons ago so that I wouldnae get bored at lunchtime. It has grown without ever troubling the "Top 4" Celtic Sites, which pimp themselves on newsnow.

In football terms we are like Reading. Nice wee side, never going to win anything but play decent football but ultimately will be like your wee cousin who you like but you feel quite sorry for as he gets bullied at school and is useless at sport.

Over the last 3 seasons we have seen 3 titles, 2 cups and 2 last 16's of the Champions League. I think we have improved content wise since those early days but all things change and nothing stands still. So with great sadness I announce that http://www.thelordofthewing.blogspot.com/ will be no more from 28th May 2008.

You can stop celebrating at the back. As the Wu Tang Clan said once the revolution would be televised. Well LOTW is joining the revolution that is http://www.oleole.com/ . A football revolution on the net. An alternative idea, which, for me, is like John Lydon and The Sex Pistols swearing on national tv. Here is the blurb that can explain it better than I can.

The nice people at oleole want LOTW to become the featured blog on Celtic. It was an oppertunity I couldnae miss. We are in at the start. It's the future and I reckon it will be bigger than King Kongs gonads.

What will change? Nothing. Well, we will get a new address (http://thelordofthewing.oleole.com/) and a new lick of paint (the design is that top secret I have just seen a snippet, then the jpeg exploded) plus the chance to add new features.

So, here is the Lord Of The Wing profile page. Log in, tune in and drop out. It's life but not as we know it.

I hope to see all the LOTWites that have made this wee blog what it is over on oleole. If I don't then I hope to see you someday on the other side. Enjoy. I'll leave with a wee song that I think is apt.

Hello Goodbye.

Forza

*T-shirt at the top of the blog is available at Kerrydale Street. All proceeds going to charity and they are the must have of the summer. I've got mine. No it isnnae an extra large....

Helicopter: Destination Dundee

In all the buzz of winning the league on the last day (for the first time since we stopped 10, is it better this time than then?) I forgot that we actually won a game of football and it took me 1 hour after the final whistle to remember that we had qualified for the Champions League next season.

Once again we have been deemed too good for the UEFA Vase Trophy. But make no mistake I will be quite happy to drop into the UEFA Vase trophy should our quest for the last 8 (set them high bhoys) fails after three 3-0 defeats away from Celtic Park.

The performance has been forgotten after our 1-0 victory. Nobody is talking about that we played some controlled and inventive football in the first 35 mins, football, which was not expected due to the circumstances. Yes, in the end a stalemate was looking likely due to our failure in front of goal but as soon as the news came from Aberdeen I knew we would score.

Jan Vennegor of Hesslelink has had a habit of scoring big goals in the last 6 weeks to prove why he gets a game. His 124th minute strike against The Huns and on Thursday night are stuff of Celtic folklore. Stuff that means he will never need to buy a drink down The Gallowgate again.

Paul Hartley swung in a cracking ball and Big Jan was there with his big bear type head to score another goal from a set piece at Tannadice. Just like the boxing day game he settled the nerves. Just like boxing day as well Paul Hartley was part of the reason we went to the 5th hardest away ground in the SPL (behind Aberdeen and Hibs) and saw the game out in a party mood.

And what an emotional party it was. This was a massive league win. 3 in a row for the first time in 40 years. Maley, Stein and now Strachan. It was coupled with the watching of the biggest (but expected) collapse since The Berlin Wall came down.

But unlike us in 2005 they (The Huns) didn't throw this away. We won this league by winning 7 games in a row (4 home games 3 away) at the business end of the season. Celtic FC: Taking Care Of Business since 1888.

The fall out from this has been fun to read and poses questions.

This from The Guardian has been typical of the reaction. Praise where praise was due but it's all grudging. The media wanted to be creaming themselves in print over "Walter and Ally" but a wee Ginger who treats them like the lowlifes they are got one over on them. The only hope the media have is that GS leaves and they can beat the Celtic support with the sticks that we chased him away because he is not Celtic minded.

What big bulls bollocks.

So is he going to leave. His impassioned speech in the huddle at the end of the game (when he kept pointing to the fans) I thought was off a man that was leaving. Thoughts of Wim The Tim went through my mind when I saw him calling all the players over. My gut instinct was that he would leave as he has always said 3 years is a long time at a big club. Seems I might have been wrong, not for the first time (see Paul Hartley, Barry Robson and Skippy)

Scott McDonald, Barry Robson, Peter Lawell and Neil "The Waterbhoy" Lennon have been gushing with praise for their boss. Add to them the comments and from Dermot and John Reid
then I sense a fear from the club that he is going to walk away. Maybe, they are just trying to cover all bases to ensure that he stays right enough.

Update: Dermot ramps it up a bit by saying Gordon will have a job for life. Doesn't say that it will be as manager right enough. Stadium facilities manager? Catering assistant? Head Steward in the Lisbon Lions stand?

Also today we have this feel good story from The Ragger. The season must well be over and their exclusive deal with the darkside run out if they are printing 2 of Celtic best players to stay stories.

Over on the darkside they are hurting. We have Barry Nicholson and Jimmy "The Fat Orange Midget" Calderwood annoyed that their team tried against R*ngers and they couldnae join in the celebrations. They were probably annoyed that the Aberdeen fans rubbed "Scotland's Shame" nose right in a big pile of dug shite after it has eat a left over vindaloo.

A wee word to the F.O.M and Barry. GIRUY. Oh and Barry enjoy Southend or Colchester and I'm sure we will see you soon with St.Johnstone or Queen of the South you little beastie.

Enough, the highlights. I'm off to put a fiver on Queen Of The South to win the cup.

Forza

*Thanks to Number7 on Kerrydale Street for the picture.

The Fat Eddie Murphy Has Sung....

Last Wednesday morning I was searching the glove box of my battered banger for some music to listen to on the way to work. The Radio was full of the UEFA Vase Trophy build up and I couldnae be arsed listening to that.

Out fell an album by the popular beat combo Oasis. It was their last album "Don’t Believe The Truth". Decent album by recent standards and the title is the mantra of the Scottish press who believe moonbeams and shit.

It was the CD that caught my eye, though and not the thought that I wanted to listen to it. The CD says one word. "Believe". That’s apt I thought. So on it went and it has been on since.

When the anti-football of the wattnaccio lost to Zenit then we had "The Battle Of Manchester" I started to "Believe". The wistful tones of Beatles copyists suddenly became the soundtrack of the comeback.

I will tell no lies. If R*ngers had won the UEFA Vase then I would have probably wiped Seville from my mind. It wouldnae have mattered if they were the worst team ever (which they were as the stats proved) they would have surpassed our achievement.

The FACT they were pilloried for their "style" from all corners of the globe and then a significant "minority" ((C) Martin Bain and the Scottish Press) made sure that their UEFA run would be remembered for one thing and one thing only has made Seville all the sweeter.

Bitter and small minded that maybe. But I couldnae give a flying monkey from The Wizard Of Oz even if it shat over my car. It’s a rivalry. We play in a two horse town, with one horse being so ugly they willnae make it into clue and the other a thoroughbred.

6 weeks ago we needed a 12 point swing to even have a chance or to win the league. We had two games against them and we had to hope that R*ngers terrible away record (9 wins out of 19, 5 defeats and 5 draws add to that 1 win in 10 away games against top 6 teams and them only winning 10 games out of 20 against top 6 teams) meant that if we won those two games then it was game on as they had the harder run in.

They had a harder run in as they had played all their hame games in Feb and March. A fact often overlooked by the suits at the pox. They also started moaning about the amount of games they had to play. This moan did play on the players mind.

Christen "will sell soul for two pieces of silver" Dailly says here, that the circumstances did have a bearing. This is the same "player / thug" that said a few weeks ago that he didnae mind the amount of games as it comes with being successful?

Wonder what changed his mind? Two soul destroying defeats and being part of one of the most embarrassing periods in R*ngers history? Is the fact that he was an integral part in the biggest collapse since the flats in the Gorbals were blown up and the team has been proved to be not very good not have something to do with it?

I said at the start of the season that losing to a team that contained the likes of Weir, Broadfoot, Papac and Novo (The Skankmonster) was a sacking offence. Maybe that comment was made in haste as R*ngers found their best form for 36 years.

Their home record was second to none (only one defeat all season) and against limited fodder at home and abroad their "style", ahem, was bludgeoning and effective. As we floundered in two major spells during the season it look like a shrug of the shoulders and the acceptance that sometimes it just wisnny meant to be.

This blog was going to highlight facts, figures and bullshit saying that we played and done quite well this season. Now, I can back up the facts figures and bullshit wie the saying CHAMPIONEES 2007/08.

In the 3 seasons we have had under GS and the 3 times we have won the league under GS (GIRUY!!!!!) we have finished with 91, 84 and 89 points. The winning margins have been 17, 12 and 3 points.

Now, this may be seen as a downward trend but I think winning the league this time is his greatest achievement as manager. He has seen off a team on a fantastic run. The last 2 times they were on that type of run we have lost out by a goal and a point.

We have scored 19 more goals this season than last. Most of that is down to the signing of Skippy and the progression of Aiden McGeady. GS can take credit for both of these factors.

This season we lost only 26 goals. The past 2 the figures were 37 and 34. For a defence that was as shaky (to some) as a Lex Ballie-Paul McGuigan combination and the media compared it as being a Lada to R*ngers BMW of Weir and Ugly Betty.

How did we get the best defence in the league? Fuck knows. Half the season we were shouting for (not me!"!!!) Bobo to return and most wanted Gary Caldwell chucked of the Empire State Building tied to a B&Q paving slab.

So in the absence of any logical answer then I will give GS credit for this and say zonal marking is the greatest thing since white see through trousers.

But for every silver lining there is big black rain cloud. It was his fault that we were put through the wringer. Our home record was the main bug bear. We dropped points against Kilmarnock, Hibs, St Mirren, Dundee Utd and Motherwell. Add to that domestic cups defeats against Hearts and Aberdeen and we can safely say that Fortress Parkheid is no more.

We don't hammer teams at CP anymore. We have scored an average 2.21 per game both home and away this season. I would expect the home average to be higher. We seem to lack motavation against "smaller" teams. That is something we need to sort. Not that we lacked motavation in the last 7 games.

Was it something to do wie the returning Neil Lennon? Or the fact our manager bit the bullet and stuck with a winning midfield partnership and decided that his two big money midfield signings were not cutting the mustard. Or was it this interesting article from E-Tims, which alludes to a meeting between GS, Tommy Burns and John Reid in which the continuation of the Celtic Way was agreed.

Mind you what John Reid knows about fitba' is probably about the same as I know about strating a war in the Middle East.

Whatever it was (I reckon a combination of the above) no man for me has done more than Barry Robson. Whether he only got a game due to suspension or by accident it was the best forced decision GS has made in his Celtic managerial career.

Maradona gets credited for winning the 1986 World Cup singled handed. Barry Robson should get the credit for pulling us back from the brink of nowhereville and headlong into the light that was 3 in a row. The Ginger Naka was this years Nakamura. He step up to the plate in this his best season of his career.

His first challenge in the R*ngers game when he pole axed Christen "sell his soul for two pieces of silver" Dailly showed what he was about. He was not about to be bullied. He then went on to score the winner in the next derby game.

He can be added to the list of successful signings or manager has made.

So when did I think we could do it? 94th minute of the the first R*ngers game at Celtic Park. It was the Alan Stubbs in 1997 moment. The moment the season turned. One perfect pin point Caldwell pass, knock back from Skippy and diving heider from Jan meant that the Brittannia that was ruling the waves from the Lisbon Lions Stand was sunk by a U-Boat coming up the Clyde.

Perfect.

I leave you with a bit of Frank Sinatra and his classic opening lines from That's Life.

"That's life, that's what all the people say. You're riding high in April, Shot down in May"

Forza

Post Match Session: CHAMPIONEES.

My eyes were in Dundee tonight, my ears in Aberdeen and I witnessed a brillant sight, the best sight I have seen. The League took many twists this time and also many turns......but Celtic won the league this time for Tommy Burns.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tonight we met our destiny, fulfill our date with fate, on such tense and stressful nights, LEGENDS we create, from Boruc to McDonald, behind them to a man, emotions will be fragile, the joys of being a fan, the pride of following Celtic, seeps out from every pour, behind them untill the bitter end regardless of the score, so sing the songs with pride, songs with which you've grown, and remember as a CELTIC FAN YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE.

Forza

Dundee Unt v CHAMPIONS - FT 0-1

Massive result - that's what's makes us CHAMPIONS !!!

We did on our own - don't needs results elesewhere or help from MIBs to help us.
We are CELTIC.

Won by POINTS and a KNOCKOUT

Where's that helicopter ???

Hail Hail - THREE in a ROW !!!

Dundee Unt v Celts - HT 0-0

Nerves jangling.

In normal times this is what you would call a cracking game.
Both teams going full pelt, and both having clear cut chances.
Not being "normal times", we want Celtic goals.

I hope Gordon tells everybody to calm down a bit. Things are very frantic there.

A couple of players not at their best: Naylor (what does Wilson have to do to get a game?), Naka (control let him down a few times), defense generally shaky.

We still have 45min to make the difference.
But it gonna be hard.

Dundee Unt v Celts - Preamble

Well, here we are - in less than an hour the New Firm will kick off against the Glasgow Giants to finally determine which way the helipcopter will go.

After the last couple of weeks in which we Celts have been put thru one hellava emotional wringer, we are finally back in the driving seat for the final game of the season.

We know that a win will ensure the 2007/08 league flag and 3 in a row.

Lately, we have seen the worst the football world has to offer, and we have also seen the best.
Plenty of ink has already been spilt on all that - and tonight we are about to go through the wringer again to write the final chapter.

We have the players - we have the class - we have the will to win.
Whatever team lines up in the hoops is better than anything the SPL has to offer.

Tonight, I think we will win this, not by goal difference, not just be points but a knockout!!!

Go for it, Bhoys - make us proud.

Decanted Last Day Squeaky Bum Newsamble

Sunday morning "Sweeney" on ITV4. You canny beat it. A bit of Regan, Carter and un-PC 1970's dialogue, hard drinking and the beating of "nonce's". You also get the straight down the middle nicknames. Like on Sunday, the Welsh "nonce" was called "Taff".

Sure I heard them mention leeks and sheep as well. Superb. Changed days now as a few seasons back Craig Bellamy was called a "Welsh basturd" by a nasty Hearts fan who was promptly lifted and charged for racist abuse. I have heard worse coming from the lowlifes from the East.

Where am I going with this? I'm worried, you see, I might offend the couple of folk that read this rubbish if I call R*ngers "Scummy bottle merchant c*nts" or "Shitebagging inter breeding yer mums yer sister we didnae want an extension to cheat oor way to the title arseholes".

I know that there is a lot of decent Raunjers fans out there. I know some. I mean the battle of Manchester was all those nasty Chelsea / Millwall / Man U / Rusden and Diamonds Casuals who bought tops and kidded on to be Scots. No mention of the FACT that all of those arrested were Scottish.....strange that. Mind you it was the News Of The World it peddled that shite.

In this day and age you have to watch what you are saying. So would R*ngers being labelled bottle merchants, shitebags or just plain fecking shite offend anyone when, after all, they have took the season to the last extended day? Or will we be again the bottlers and watch all our good work come crashing down when we fail to seal the deal.

The Monday night game that R*ngers had was always going to be the gimmie. They have only lost one game against teams in the bottom half of the league all this season. Though it was away from home and it was only 3rd away win since Feb it was a case of them not making massive inroads to our goal difference.

Was quite confident that this wouldn't happen as it wasn't exactly Sutton, Hartson and Larsson they had up front. Novo, Boyd and Darcheville weren't going to score a barrowload even if St Mirren (as they did) put on the worst display seen in the SPL this season. Enjoy your holidays lads you showed last night that being on the pish in the South of Spain was all that was on your minds.

Wonder what will be on the minds of the players of Aberdeen and Dundee Utd?

CQN highlights the decent records both teams have at home. A scratch underneath the surface of these stats shows Aberdeen winning 10 out of 19 home games, drawing 5 and losing 4. Their goal average is 1.63 but they lose just over a goal per game at home. This is dangerous considering R*ngers record of winning 26 out of the 28 games they have scored first in.

Added to that, Aberdeen have a terrible record against the top 6 teams only winning 4 times against these teams. No matter R*ngers poor away form if they score first they should win three points.

So that makes our job simple. We need to win. We need to go to a stadium where the last time we lost was under John Barnes and have not a bad record at. We have had a few draws but mostly victories. I won't lie. If I had to choose an away game for the last game Dundee or Aberdeen would have been it. Wouldn't have fancied Easter Road or Fir Park.

So is my confidence misplaced? Probably. Dundee Utd have won 9 out of 18 home games, drawing 6 and losing three. More importantly, for me, the goal average is 1.44 per game and worryingly they have only lost 0.72 this season. They also like scoring the first goal. 21 times they have went in front this season (Celtic have 25 times) and have held on to win 14 and only lose twice when they have scored first.

Celtic on the other hand have won 23 out of the 25 games they have scored first. It's becoming clearer that whoever scores first in both games will have a MAJOR bearing. As listen to this...Dundee Utd have lost the first goal 13 times this season and lost 11. They drew the other 2. Aberdeen have also a poor record in this department. Losing the first goal on 18 occasions and only coming back to win 3 times.

I don't think we would be worried if the Hoops went behind right enough. We have lost the first goal on 10 occasions this season, winning 4, drawing 2 and losing 4. But...that doesn't tell the whole story.

At the start of April we were down and out. We needed a 12 point turn around for us to have a chance going into the last game. 18 points out of 18 followed and now, unbelievably, we are in the driving seat going into the final game. We couldn't imagine that when we left Celtic Park after a 1-0 defeat to Motherwell.

Still I agree with McGhee and "Walter" that we are still not favourites for the title. Indeed, Mark McGhee calls it correct when he says we have the hardest game left on the final day as Dundee Utd are the better team than Aberdeen.

Even our own manager is not liking the "favourites" tag. As he quite rightly points out a few weeks back there was a major number shouting for his head and that the media here seem to like building Celtic up for a fall. Also he quite rightly says that those of a "dignified" persuasion should shut up and get on with it. This is the first time the league season has been extended for any team no matter what darkside spin they try and put on it.

But....none of us that wear green and white will be overly confident this week. The spectre of "Black Sunday" hangs over this club when it comes to last day collapses. Not one of us will be thinking that it is a gimmie or an easy game even though we have not lost in our last 4 visits to Dundee (3 wins and a draw).

Recent history shows that Celtic have not won the last game of the league season for 3 seasons, ok 2 games were meaningless but the last MUST WIN game we blew big style. Difference is...that team was on the way out, they were dead on their feet and a shadow of their former glory.

Today? Team 6 games unbeaten, stood up and been counted in the last 6 high pressure games (2 wins against R*ngers included) and must have a bit of confidence going into this. We need to treat this as a one off, a cup final if you like.

Some people are saying that the players will win it for Tommy Burns. I want the players to win it for themselves. I want them to realise that the fact that they have got themselves into this position (one that they put themselves in) is too good an opportunity to pass up. The opportunity to become legends of 3 in a row. The opportunity to be remembered.

Gordon Strachan said the other week one of the greatest things about being Celtic manager was becoming Tommy Burns friend. I canny talk for Tommy, but I think he would say the greatest thing about being Celtic manager is having nights like Thursday. 27 years to the day we last won the league in Dundee. 10 years since we stopped 10 in a row. Celtic Football Club is 120 years old.

Bring it on.

Forza