Naw, It's Awe Pish: We Just Made It Up
Rubbish rumours, the papers, the fans and the pish take merchants are peddling...
The ratings system is as follows- 1 for a good chance the story or rumour will happen to 10 for away and slide doon a moonbeam ya rage, that will never happen.
number 1: Nakashuanskie- From the Daily Mail and again.
Rating: 2 oot of 10. Good chance of this happening, as the rumours of a unhappy Naka- wanting his son to go to school i Japan- and Shaun have been abound for a while and despite wee Shaunies agent being a complete hideous beast of a man it looks like he will return.
Number 2: Jerome "Johnny" Rothen swap for Bobo Balde- From Oor Paris Mole
Rating: 5 oot of 10. Well, that is according to oor source. Left sided midfielder unhappy at a misfiring PSG and wishes another crack at the Champions League. May have to settle for the UEFA cup though.Bobo the other way? PSG are shite in defence and Karl Svensson is not available so it could be a goer.
Number 3: Colin Nish-Randelstown CSC
Rating: 8 oot of 10. C’mon, i know Bruno Hefflelump is always injured but this guys name could be mockney ryming slang....”I’m going for a Colin Nish, get me a pint”...but the guy is really Colin Nish.
Number 4: Marcello Gallardo- Ronnie Corbett’s love child via French Papers then E-mail
Rating: 7 oot of 10. Ronnie says- “ 31 year Argentenian midfielder. Had a spell at Monaco (I think)...always thought he was a quality player when he played in the 98 world cup.”
Number 5: Steven Fletcher- Kaney via SMS via his da' who was talking to Gary Caldwell's da'...also in the daily ragger today
Rating 3 oot of 10. Kaney says- " we wanted the King o' King's but it looks like we will get another Hibee. My Da' was talking to Caldwell's Da' and he said he will be at CP next week and is Celtic daft."
Number 6: Kyle Lafferty- Sunday Life.
Rating: 6 oot of 10. Another Celtic linked wie big striker story....don’t think there is much in this, to tell you the truth. Guy burst on the scene last year and has done nothing really since. Money they will be asking will mean this won’t happen. But what do I know, so expect to see him in the Hoops.....
Number 7: George Elokobi -Sky via Vital Colchester
Rating 2 oot of 10. So why do I reckon this will happen? Two words. Adam Virgo. Oor manager has been known to plunder the fizzy pop league for the next big thing and the FACT that this boy is a left back means i'm putting two and two together and getting five.
Number 8: Benni McCarthy-Daily Express via Tribal Fitba'
Rating 8 oot of 10- Would GS put up wie a player that has fallen oot wie his current manager due to the fact he is lazy and unfit? Also his wages and temperament mean that he is a stick on to go to the h*ns....they buy all the egotistical big heided bawbags....
Number 9: Grzegorz Szamotulski- The Daily Mail
Rating 3 oot of 10- Oor managers habit of buying players for positions we dinny need cover and also the fact that the guy is oot of contract means Mark Brown could be packing his bags by the 1st January. Which would be a shame as i think he is an able deputy and a future numero uno when the holy goalie leaves.
Number 10: Matt Taylor- The Sun via Ronnie Corbetts love childs e-mail.
Rating 5 oot of 10- Out of favour full back, we have no full backs, Sun lackie puts two and two together and comes up wie lazy journalism.....
Number 11: Michael Hart-Setanta Sports
Rating 3 oot of 10- Aberdeen right back linked, wie the fat orange umpa lumpa stating that “Well if anybody gets an offer like that, you can’t talk them out of it" all while denying there is an offer and warning that he won't get a game....hopefully he might talk him oot of it...Mr Hart husnae been exactly Mark Wilson impressive, or even Jocky Wilson impressive when i have seen him....
Number 12: James "Law" "Kenny" McFadden-Talkin Soccer from the times
Rating 10 oot of 10- The new sensation of Scottish fitbaw, the only sensation of Scottish fitba to tell the truth that flatters to deceive. I don't even think it is worth talking aboot this wan, as big feck will pay a kings ransom to take him to relegation bound Birmingham...
Any rumours from the guy doon the boozer, a taxi driver, a cousins auntie who cleans so and so bog?
e-mail nawitsawepish@live.co.uk -It is a real e-mail addy.....
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14 comments:
I like this one, already had visions of Shaun and Aiden terrorising full backs, widnae mind if this happened
Just watchin Norn Iron on BBC Norn Iron and the commentator has just called the NI fans the best in Europe and i can hear them doing the bouncy.....
Can it be re-judged?
international update
See Romanov's country beat Georgia in Georgia....were u watching big Eck?
naw-its-awe-pish-just-made-it-up:
Bobo going home in a swap deal in January for PSG's Jerome Rothen.
I got this from, eh, a friend of mine who goes to a wee boarding house type place near Parc de Prince and he was speaking to the Madame that runs it - so this is hot stuff.
Rating: 5 oot of 10.
One player I would love to see in the hoops, great left-sided midfielder, strong with a sweet left foot, always gives 120%. Wants away from PSG who are going nowhere under LeGuen to find his level again in the Champs League (finalist in 2004 with Monaco).
Celtic have been on his trail for a while, and PSG are desperate to bolster their defense.
Would immediately be loved by the Tic fans and dubbed "Johnny".
Sixtaeseven the E-mail is a real address, will let you of this time but any rumours must be e-mailed.
This is not an Ant and Dec production all votes are counted....
Jerome Rothen if we resign Shaun and already have Aiden and Naka for the wide berths then is GS going for the Martin Jol tactic of having 17 midfielders in the squad?
That was a coo pun bus tur at the Wembley potato field * (*courtesy of Johann Cruyff)!
I fancy a France v Italy final already!
International Update Is it true that Big Feck has been seen at Soho Square this morning?
For the love of ma Croation grannie....
Marcello Gallardo
Should be a prize for anyone who knows who he is......
Gallardo is at PSG - only gets the odd cameo these days and is defo past his best (he was good at Monaco years(?) ago.
Would much rather have Johnny Rotten - bonus is that, him coming would mean a sure exit for JiriJay.
PLeGuen definately has a knack for getting the worst out of players!!
Sixtaeseven Can you confirm that was in the French press yesterday?
And if anyone wants to donate a prize- since google took off the ads-, i'm thinking maybe a free account wie a multi national betting firm or free sub to Channel 67 or t-shirts will punt t-shirts, then feel free to contact me:-)
Another midfielder then but i quite like Jirijay....
C'est la merde - c'est la fabrication - j'espere:
/o\ /o\ /o\
Mercato : Gallardo proposé au Celtic.
Ne figurant plus dans le groupe depuis le match contre Valenciennes, l’Argentin du PSG, Marcello Gallardo ne semble plus rentrer dans les plans de Paul Le Guen. De ce fait, le club recherche actuellement preneur en vue du Mercato et l’aurait proposé dernièrement au club écossais du Celtic Glasgow.
Recruté sous l’air de Guy Lacombe l’hiver dernier, peu de temps avant l’arrivée de Paul Le Guen à la tête de l’équipe, Gallardo ne semble pas avoir convaincu le coach breton. Très peu utilisé cette saison avec une seule titularisation et 5 entrées en jeu, l’Argentin n’a plus mit un pied sur la pelouse depuis la réception de Bordeaux au Parc des Princes (1-2) lors de la 9ème journée de Ligue 1.
Ecarté aujourd’hui du groupe, Marcello Gallardo semble convié à poursuivre sa carrière loin de Paris,les services du joueur ont été proposé dernièrement au Celtic Glasgow. Rappelons que Gallardo est sous contrat avec le PSG jusqu’en juin 2009.
Steven Fletcher
That's what i'm talking aboot...the first i was talking to so and so rumour backed up wie evidence in the ragger....
If we punt Magic and Deek this could be a goer and we all know GS likes shopping in salt and sauce land.....
Update since last time....
Steven Fletcher looks like that rumour from Gary Caldwells da- who seems as guid at rumours as his laddie is at RB- is a no go...
All the rest the LOTW bookie is still taking bets on....
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