Hinkel In For A Tinkel + Holy Goalie Smoalie….Mid Winter Just Got Interesting…

"Where's ze fans?"

Mawwwwwwwwwwwwww, did I miss something? A 70,000 sooperdooper stadium from oor soothside nee’bours, built wie a sponsors cash, linked to a hotel, casino, shopping mall and all decked in the blueness of blue wie the bank balance firmly in the black wie £60 a game tickets the norm for the bigot brothers?

That’s as almost as believable as Roberto Hooton being a £10m player- © The Evening Times- or a bid even coming in near that amount from a manager who replied “Alan Who” when asked aboot his blockbusting sweet type bid.

Surely in this winter, when the orcs should be luvin the fact that they are now in the driving seat, the moonbeam one is peddling guid news stories to his lapdogs to hide the fact that after the festival of Benzem they are skint, won’t be spending nae dosh UNLESS they sell their most saleable asset, for a tidy sum, before he comes pish again?

Surely no? Are the medija that under the moonbeam spell that even they must realize that the follow followers won’t swallow this? They canny be that stupid to believe that they huvnae been trying to punt the “The White Cafu” behind his back and take their eye of the prize by promising the hoards untold riches and succulent surroundings to eat their blue nose burgers and wipe their arses in?

At least Celtic are not as bad….well they are really wie their Arfur Boruc non story. Right, he has signed a bumper deal- worth anything from £20,000 a week to £33,000-, which extends his stay to 2011 the SSM, would LIKE US to believe. Me, I smell Stan Petrov.

I still believe and think, the Holy Goalie will be off in the summer if some sooperdooper club wie a 70,000 all seater stadium comes in and meets the Hooton type price, which will be written into the small print of the bumper contract. If no sooperdooper club comes in wie a Hooton type bid or if some smaller club than Celtic comes in wie a Hooton type bid but Arfur disnny fancy it then he will stay.

Simple really.

Right, I want the big pole in the goal to stay until he is fat, 40 and looks like the polish John Burridge in an ill fitting rigoot but I know that will not happen. I’m happy wie the fact that Celtic will not actively court bids for the goalie but have laid the cards on the table, gave the holy one a deal that others, only a chosen few, will have to at least match or beat and placed a value on him that means we win a watch if someone meets it.

We are not trying to punt him behind his back. Arfur knows the score. Maybe the SSM likes to pay the fans for fools but he is fair game wie his saleable assets.

The Holy Goalie will have a new Bavarian pal to abuse, punch and shout at when we return to action. Andreas Hinkel, the 25-year-old Seville reject- © Radio Tuecther this evening- has joined to sort the problematic right back slot. Bad news for Andreas is that we have now found out he can play left back as well….but that was only according to Oliver Bonhoff.

While signing a former German international whom at 25 has his best years ahead of him, was kept oot of the Seville team by the new Roberto Hooton- Daniel Alves- a player subjected to trillion pounds bids in the summer- and he has not played for Hibs why am I still not to excited at this signing?

Main reason that GS record in the full back market has been poor. Mo Camara, Adam Virgo, Mark Wilson, Lee Naylor and the Ross Wallace experiment- which has been followed up wie the O’Dea, Conroy and Calderbuer experiment- means that his record at spotting and signing a decent full back is running at 35%. Almost as guid or bad, depends on how you look at it, as his creative midfielder success rate.

Wie the h*ns now edging in front, wie no sign of dropping points soon, this period is as crucial as ANYTIME since Bratislava. GS has a couple of weeks to bolster the squad correctly and get the team playing well again. Player returning from injuries will help the team also if he gets the correct players in, then balance should return ending the playing players oot of position palaver that we have seen recently.

In saying that rumors that he fancies the Brazilian full back Coelho as a right hand sided midfielder, has been known to play players on the wrong wings, center backs as full backs and attacking midfielders on the wing or in the holding role means we canny take nuthin for granted!!!!

This windae will either cement GS as a Celtic legend of a manager or cement the view that he is oor Big Eck that no matter his success his signings will ultimately be his downfall.

So, do I wish we were back to league duty on Saturday when we play ma hometown club- I know support ma local team etc- in the Scottish cup, which we are getting for nuthin and I’m attending because, I am a fan and I attend games also that after last seasons ticket fiasco for the final will need to ensure ma swipe card has been noted as being at the game along wie the 20,000 others that will bother to turn up.

No, another week to before a return to league duty suits me fine. Another week to sign another few players, decide if we will go Brazilian this winter and get rid of the excess fat that sits on oor bench, in the stand swiping the money from the coffers. So what if we go further behind, if GS gets the next few weeks right it won't make any difference.

It also gives me the chance to watch a team I used to watch frequently. Well, many moons ago at the old Annfield, when I used to stand in the Kop end- the only covered end of the stadium- wie ma mates when Celtic were away from hame and Faither G widnae take me to away games.

Saw some "greats". Wullie Irvine, Wullie Watters, Jim Brogan and the infamous Robert Reilly being a notable footnote in ma fitba watching and I also remember Liam Brady playing for Celtic in a reserve game, I think, and being the best player on the park by a country mile in a green and black pinstriped away kit. I also was present at the first every game played on Astroturf in Scotland and the first ever game at Forthbank.

Canny remember much aboot that game at Forthbank but I do remember I purchased my first CD that day..Blur’s For Tomorrow CD single.

Lost interest when they moved to Forthbank. Hassle to get to and I had disposable income to travel to Celtic week in week oot. Even wie Sunday games now, instead of going to Forthbank, where they have a decent team under the guidance of Allan Moore, I will go and watch Milton Amateurs as it is less hassle than taking the car to Forthbank. Oh, and I can have a pint in the wee social club.

So it’s wie a heavy heart I say I hope the hoops take 10 of the Binos, wie Hinkel getting a hat trick.

Forza